Week 1 Results

I apologize for this being a day late. I was unexpectedly scheduled for ten hour shifts this week. But on to the good stuff!

My first week of cutting and increasing my workouts has yielded good results. I ate a little more than I had planned with 14,037 calories for the week (2,005/day). However, my workouts were very intense (more on that in a second) and I still lost 2.4 pounds (154.8 pounds). Likely a good  portion of this initial loss was water weight from cutting out processed carbs and junk food. Only another week will tell!

 154.8 pounds

Building a nice V-taper

I've been focusing on more power lifting-style strength workouts with accessory lifts that will build up my physique. This means lower reps with heavy weight for my main lifts (squat, deadlift, bench press, overhead press) and lower weight and higher reps for my accessory lifts. I did a quick shoulder session plus 15 minutes of cardio on Tuesday. I believe it consisted of overhead press, front barbell raise, dumbbell lateral raise, front plate raise, and upright barbell rows. I was in a rush and did not write down what I actually did.

Wednesday I benched with a friend of mine. He is competing in a power lifting competition in May and has agreed to help me train for strength and size. Our workout was:

Warmup: Walk on treadmill 10 minutes

Bench Press:

8 x Bar (45 pounds)

5 x 5 @ 75, 95, 95, 105, 100 pounds

Incline dumbbell press:

10 x 10 with 20 pound dumbbells

Shrugs:

5 x 7 @ 135, 135, 135, 155, 155

Dips:

5 x 15 (I used 60 lbs on the assisted dip machine)

Friday I met my friend again for deadlifts and posterior chain (back) training. My workout was as follows:

Deadlifts:

8 x 135 pounds, 8 x 185 pounds

3 x 225 pounds

4 sets of 2 x 225 pounds

5 x 185 pounds

5 sets of 3 at 185 pounds

Deficit Deadlifts (standing on a 45 lb plate):

5 x 7 @ 135, 185, 185, 185, 185

Hamstring Curls:

4 sets of 10 @ 45 pounds

10 x 60 pounds

Barbell Rows:

4 sets of 10 x 95 pounds

On Saturday I went hiking in Ohiopyle with my boyfriend and his dog. We spent about an hour and a half doing a 4 mile hike out to see waterfalls and then back to the car. And on Sunday we went to see the Pirates vs. Cardinals season opener. There may have been some beers involved but I kept it to a minimum and we brought our own food to the tailgate and ate again at home after the game. It wasn't as hard as I thought it would be and we saved money too!

Ohiopyle hiking selfie

Some examples of my nutrition this week would be tuna, Greek yogurt, and lots of veggies. I also ate a good bit of salmon, beef, and chicken as well as sweet potato. I felt like this whole week was really hectic and didn't allow for much meal prep so I kept it simple and quick most days.

 Mediterranean Style Tuna (from a packet), California blend veggies, and Greek yogurt

Salmon (marinated in soy sauce and ginger) with wilted spinach and strawberries

For week 2 I plan to drop my calories just a little lower (maybe 1,900 per day average) and continue to workout 4-5 days per week. I'd like to add in more cardio but that will depend on how I feel and my work schedule. I always start my workouts with 10-15 minutes of cardio but I would prefer to get a solid 20-30 minutes at least 3 times per week for health and the extra calorie burn. 

And that concludes week one of my return to fitness! Please comment and share if you are following along! 

Week 0 - Getting Started

I wanted to start off with the basics of how I'm setting up my cutting program and some ideas of what and how much I'm eating. Everyone is different and I've found that I need to eat more than most women my size. Using a standard TDEE (Total Daily Energy Expenditure) calculator online I get a TDEE of just over 2,100 calories per day. So what does that mean? Well it means that I should consume an average of 2,100 calories per day to maintain my weight.

I track my daily and weekly calories (2,100 calories x 7 days = 14,700 calories/week) because it leaves more wiggle room to eat a little more or a little less each day as my appetite (or social engagements) demands. The common calculation is to subtract 3,500 calories per week (500 per day) to lose a pound per week. Half that to lose half a pound per week, which is my goal. So, my calculations say I should eat 1,850 calories per day or 12,950 per week (2,100 - 250 = 1,850) to lose 0.5 pounds every 7 days. But I have found this doesn't hold true for me. On 13,000 calories per week I was losing closer to 1.5 pounds every week. I'm not sure if it's because I work a somewhat physical job or if I just have more muscle or a higher metabolism than estimated. So I'm eating 'at maintenance' (2,100 calories per day) for now to see if and how my weight changes over the next couple weeks. I will adjust up or down as necessary to reach my goal loss of 0.5 - 1 pound each week.

The next step in making my comeback was cleaning out my fridge. All of the Easter candy and goodies are gone. There is no junk food in my house AT ALL. I know that I like to eat when I'm stressed or anxious so I have taken away the unhealthy options and replaced them with Quest Bars and Arctic Zero 'ice cream'. I also got back to meal prepping.

My fridge

My current food situation consists of oats, eggs, egg whites, strawberries, Greek yogurt, chicken, beef, sweet potato, rice, asparagus, broccoli, spinach, almond milk, rice cakes, almonds, peanut butter, and coffee. I haven't committed to a set 'meal plan' for this week but I did prepare meals for breakfast and work each day to make staying on track easier. 

Breakfast is usually oats and berries plus a protein shake

Lunch was a 3 oz. lean beef burger with rice and asparagus

Dinner was another burger with peanut butter and sweet potato

My snacks, or smaller meals, consist of things like chicken with veggies, a Quest bar, or 1-2 rice cakes and almonds. I also drink 3-4 liters of water each day and take a multivitamin, fish oil, vitamin D, and a probiotic. Making sure that I get plenty of protein, healthy fats, and all of the necessary nutrients is my top priority for ensuring my metabolism and weight return to normal (and stay healthy).

This is long enough (and probably boring). I will write more about my workouts in my first update post and cover how I decide what adjustments to make to my nutrition. If I missed anything or didn't explain it well enough just drop a note in the comments and I will make sure I cover it in my next post! 

Finally, thank you to everyone who took the time to read and respond to my initial post. It isn't easy to admit I'm struggling and that I don't look and feel my best right now. But I know that I can help people if I swallow my pride and bare my progress for the world. It means more than you'll ever know that so many of you have reached out and offered support and kind words. <3 p="">

Fit to Fat to Fit In Real Life

I'm sure everyone has seen or heard about the show Fit to Fat to Fit. If not, well, its basic premise is a personal trainer/fitness professional purposely becomes overweight and then loses it alongside their client. I have enjoyed the episode or two I managed to catch but I never thought I would be the 'fat' trainer. And yet here I am.

I set a goal of competing again this year in May. I worked out and ate well but in excess up until the new year. I weighed in around 142 pounds over the holidays. My goal was to put on as much muscle as possible and then cut down to stage ready from mid-January to mid-May. Then I would go through with peak week preparations and step on stage to better my standings from last year.

Warning: If you are squeamish then you may want to skip the next paragraph.

We all know the saying about the best laid plans... I became consumed with seeing how lean I could get. I averaged 1.5-2 pounds a week lost. While this rate of loss is considered safe medically it was too extreme when I was already fairly lean. I dropped down to 129 pounds around Valentine's Day and I estimated I was at 13.8% body fat. With over three months to my show date it was too early to be so close to stage ready. I started to experience problems with overwhelming cravings, extreme hunger, and then my periods stopped. I decided to put some weight back on and reevaluate my competition readiness after 4-6 weeks.

129 pounds

What I didn't expect was how hard my body would rebound. At first I assumed a good bit of the gain was water weight. But the scale kept jumping up... and up and up. My clothes got tighter and people started to notice. I was still happy with how I looked but I worried that I had done metabolic damage with my cut. I finally plateaued at 157 pounds. The heaviest I have ever been.

157 pounds

Now that my body has finally stabilized again I am ready to take off the excess weight at a more reasonable pace. I have planned out meals and calculated my calories needs to lose 0.5-1 pound a week this time. I may not step on stage in May but my ultimate goal is to be healthy and happy. Thankfully I'm still pretty comfortable in my own skin at this weight.

I decided to share my journey back to health and fitness here in hopes of helping someone else. Shows like the one I mentioned only gloss over the details. I want to share every last bit of my journey from meal planning and prepping to workouts to progress pictures. My goal is to share weekly updates for anyone who is interested but also to motivate myself. 

Please leave me a comment if there is anything you would like me to share this weekend when I post my first update! Let's get on track to our summer (and beyond!) bodies together. 

Chasing Rainbows

I haven't blogged at all yet this year. In fact, I haven't done much yet this year. Please don't think that I am insinuating that I have been lazy or given up by any means. I simply have taken time to work on myself and reevaluate my dreams and goals in order to build a plan. Normal life (beyond work and the gym and raising children) took a backseat.

I took my nutrition and training back to the drawing board and overhauled everything. I'm keeping a close log of how every change affects my overall package. I have brought my posing back to basics in hopes of having a much better presentation when I finally do compete again. I have kept my focus on building muscle while keeping my body fat down. Now I am finally beginning to 'cut' and start to get into stage shape.

Meanwhile, I have also been working on designing a career path. I have spent ten years in my industry and gathered certifications and qualifications that should be worth quite a bit to the right employer. I have put a lot of thought into what the 'right' job would look like for me versus how I can be of the most value to an employer. I have made an effort to make my current position take the shape of my vision but have not been able to work with my current company to see it through. I'm in negotiations with another company and I hope that I'll be able to make that announcement shortly. I pray it will be the last career change I have to make!

Lastly, I have been working on myself. I have been single for almost eight months now. That's not exactly a long time but it has been enough to clearly see where I can make progress on a personal level. I've always treated happiness and success as destinations to be reached instead of transient events/feelings that occur in the moment. Instead of focusing on these things (which our society places so much value on), I have been working on building my values and morals. I'm not going to espouse that I'm some great theologian now but I'm doing some reading and lots of listening. I've visited churches and schools and talked to friends, family, and the 'professionals' about every topic I can think of. And, while this journey will never be complete, I'm happy to say that I think my current progress will lead to the ability to have a fundamentally happy life through living true to myself. And one day maybe I can share it with a partner that is taking the same journey of self-exploration and growth.

I have missed emptying the thoughts rattling around my head onto a blank screen. And I miss the feedback that my blog received. Most of all I long for the friendships it kindled with people who related to my ramblings. So I'm going to make an honest effort to begin blogging regularly again. I'm not exactly sure of how often or how much but I want to share my journey to the stage and beyond with everyone who encouraged me to take the first steps back in 2014. I wouldn't have made it this far without you all.

Happy Leap Day friends! I'll be back soon!

Calories In Vs. Calories Out? Not so fast!

December is here and, if you're anything like me, you've been thinking (or trying to avoid it) about all the goals you didn't meet and what you want to do better in the new year. I've talked about the problems with New Year's resolutions before and I've made the same mistakes as everyone else. So for 2016 I have been doing my homework and making a plan.

What kind of plan? Well, I kind of want to compete again if the stars align. I wasn't lean or built enough in May. My placings were disappointing and I felt overall miserable about the whole experience. Since then I have dropped the coaches I was working with and started putting in the time and effort to learn enough to be my own coach. Obviously, being a certified personal trainer, I can put together an exercise plan but I knew I had to go deeper. I need to understand how my diet, my lifting, my cardio, and even my sleep patterns affect everything down to a hormonal and cellular level.

I read every study I could get my hands on. I talked to competitors I admired and those that I didn't want to emulate. I took their advice back to the books and tried to figure out the why behind how it worked (or didn't). After learning so much (and still having so much more to go) I decided to share some of what I've found to help my fellow athletes and those who just want to look or feel better in the new year. If you're ready to throw out everything you've ever believed about losing weight then keep reading.

Every diet (I hate that word) starts with counting calories. As long as you eat less than you burn you'll lose weight, right? WRONG! Studies show that people who restrict their energy (calorie) intake long term will basically adjust to the new 'normal'. Hormones like leptin, insulin, testosterone, and T3 (a thyroid hormone) will all decrease. The 'bad' hormones, ghrelin and cortisol, which encourage fat storage, will increase. Over time you have to eat less and less to continue losing weight until your body is in a chronic state of starvation and you can no longer maintain your 'diet'. You will inevitably overeat at some point and gain weight quickly because your metabolism is in the toilet.

This is where calorie cycling and refeeding come into play. Periodic refeeding (having that cheat meal or dessert) can increase the hormones that encourage fat loss temporarily. Taking this a step further, refeeds should happen on a day that you lift weights. Why? Because then your body uses those extra calories to preserve muscle (or even build a little bit more) instead of storing them as fat. Keeping your caloric intake on rest days lower than on training days will further balance out the refeeds and keep fat loss steady.

This still doesn't mean you can starve yourself the rest of the time. A weekly loss of no more than 0.7% of your weight is ideal. So, at 140 pounds, this would be 1 pound a week. As you get smaller, the amount you can safely lose without sacrificing lean mass (muscle) will also shrink. This is why a long, slow 'cut' is much better than a crash diet. I made this mistake (well, my coaches did) during my competition prep. I lost 12.5 pounds in 25 days going into my show and I was tired, weak, and mean. It took months for me to regain the strength I lost and find my motivation again. And I still didn't look as good as the other girls on that stage. So, overall, I gained nothing from the deprivation and misery.

Any bodybuilder or powerlifter will tell you that decreasing your weight will also decrease your performance. One way to fight back against this is to consume most of your carbs each day around your workout. Carbohydrates are turned into glycogen and used for energy during exercise. When your carbs run out so does your motivation, strength, and performance. Make sure your body is supplied with enough energy to get through each workout and don't do cardio before weights. Studies have shown that cardio, especially HIIT (high intensity interval training), will leave your muscles too fatigued for resistance training. 

The summary of all of my research basically comes down to what you likely already knew. Losing fat is a long, slow process. Eat enough, but not too much, and exercise often. If you were looking for the shortcut to your dream body I'm sorry to tell you that there is no legal method that will get you there any faster than good old-fashioned hard work and commitment. So get to planning ahead for your 2016 goals and, by 2017, you'll probably be shopping for a new wardrobe.

Dating Problems Only Female Bodybuilders Understand

It's finally your rest day. Not knowing what to do with your life you grudgingly agree to a night out with your girls. They feel you are lacking in something they refer to as a 'social life'. "Doesn't sarcastically smiling at the creeper in the mirror at the gym count as socializing?", you wonder. But no one else agrees so you allow them to drag you to the hottest new club playing music that makes you wish for a shot of preworkout and a barbell.

Only halfway through your first vodka on the rocks (gotta watch those carbs!) you are wondering if makeup and heels were originally designed as torture devices. Next thing you know some DYEL is grinding on your booty and muttering something about 'toned' and 'thick thighs'. You know you could hulk smash him but the next thing out of his mouth stops you mid-swing. "Can I buy you dinner?", he yells over the music. Before you can even finish your enthusiastic nod, you find yourself out the door. Somehow you find yourself sitting on his couch with an empty takeout container in front of you and an overeager dadbod hipster drooling on your neck. Then the real struggle begins:

1) Because you wore a sports bra

He's fumbling around looking for a clasp that doesn't exist and you absently wonder if you should buy some 'real' lingerie. Quickly dismissing that thought, you take pity and pull your sports bra off yourself, wincing at the shoulder DOMS from yesterday's workout. Your new meal ticket's face falls as he realizes there isn't actually any appreciable boobage hiding under your sweaty sportswear. But he quickly recovers and moves on to appreciating the bountiful squat booty instead.

2) Maybe you should have showered

Like most fit chicks, you've adopted the mantra that women don't sweat, they sparkle. Unnecessary showers take valuable time away from things like lifting and eating. You try to remember the last time you washed your hair or shaved, and fail. Maybe he will be so in awe of your physique that he won't notice you feel, and smell, like a gorilla. Quickly pushing him onto the bed you realize your mistake because

3) You're stronger than he is

He screams in agony clutching his concave chest where you gently (or so you thought) pushed him. You vacillate between assisting him and disgust. Your mind can't quite wrap around the realization that this skinny being has larger breasts than you. "Has this beta, PBR drinking, vegan cellar dweller ever picked up anything heavier than his Starbucks cup?", you wonder as you grasp wildly for a way to save the evening, but

4) Your metabolism won't wait for anyone

As you mumble a half-hearted apology your stomach lets out a roar like a chainsaw. A glance at the bedside clock reminds you that you're late for meal 6. You contemplate cannibalism but throw that idea out the window. There's no way this skinny fat missing link would fit your macros. Quickly fumbling for your clothes, you mutter an excuse about your grandmother's cat and stumble to the door to call an Uber while visions of peanut butter dance through your mind.

5) Getting laid is no longer worth the hassle

Finally home, you throw your heels into the darkest depths of the closet and dive into the sweats you left on the floor hours earlier. As your tupperware of chicken and broccoli rotates more slowly than paint drying you notice the coupon code for that new line of sportswear on the fridge. Ordering some new gear is just what you need to forget tonight! Sinking into the couch with a shaker bottle and a Quest bar, you feel grateful that the gym will always love you, no matter how bad you smell or how many callouses you have.Cardio would only ruin your gains anyway.


*Disclaimer: This post was created as a counterpoint to doyoueven.com's satirical article on the male perspective. Have a sense of humor!

Bro-conomics

I have been on the fence deciding between returning to the gym or the roads. Marathon training through the winter sounded terrible, especially since I would have to run in the dark before or after work, as well as struggling to fit in long runs on weekends with the kids. I printed out a training schedule, ran the first two weeks, and then decided it wasn't for me this season.

I started spending time with a fellow bodybuilder and began to miss lifting heavy (and having visible muscles). One week back in the gym and I'm reminded why training alone was so hard through my first prep. Just like the saying you are what you eat, you also are who you hang out with. Which brings me to the latest life lesson I must preach...

Bulking is evidence of trickle down economics. When one person bulks, everyone in their sphere of influence bulks. When you have dinner with a bodybuilder on a dirty bulk that dinner may consist of a pizza, two Primanti's sandwiches, a giant frosted brownie, and a couple large beers. Everything they can't have on a cut is on the menu and portion sizes are a laughable recommendation. Their food scale is getting less action than the average Comi-Con geek and their bathroom scales are hiding in terror.

This orgy of consumption slowly turns into them storing food in your fridge, insisting on making dinner (because chicken and broccoli again isn't cutting it), and suggesting horrible dining options regularly. Next thing you know you're eating right along with them. Then you're shopping list starts to look like you've never heard of macros or IIFYM. And then you're looking at the dog and thinking how he deserves some of these treats. He's looking a little skinny. And maybe the fish too... 

And inevitably, you wake up to the truth one day. You're bulking by association. And it's AWESOME!