Chasing Rainbows

I haven't blogged at all yet this year. In fact, I haven't done much yet this year. Please don't think that I am insinuating that I have been lazy or given up by any means. I simply have taken time to work on myself and reevaluate my dreams and goals in order to build a plan. Normal life (beyond work and the gym and raising children) took a backseat.

I took my nutrition and training back to the drawing board and overhauled everything. I'm keeping a close log of how every change affects my overall package. I have brought my posing back to basics in hopes of having a much better presentation when I finally do compete again. I have kept my focus on building muscle while keeping my body fat down. Now I am finally beginning to 'cut' and start to get into stage shape.

Meanwhile, I have also been working on designing a career path. I have spent ten years in my industry and gathered certifications and qualifications that should be worth quite a bit to the right employer. I have put a lot of thought into what the 'right' job would look like for me versus how I can be of the most value to an employer. I have made an effort to make my current position take the shape of my vision but have not been able to work with my current company to see it through. I'm in negotiations with another company and I hope that I'll be able to make that announcement shortly. I pray it will be the last career change I have to make!

Lastly, I have been working on myself. I have been single for almost eight months now. That's not exactly a long time but it has been enough to clearly see where I can make progress on a personal level. I've always treated happiness and success as destinations to be reached instead of transient events/feelings that occur in the moment. Instead of focusing on these things (which our society places so much value on), I have been working on building my values and morals. I'm not going to espouse that I'm some great theologian now but I'm doing some reading and lots of listening. I've visited churches and schools and talked to friends, family, and the 'professionals' about every topic I can think of. And, while this journey will never be complete, I'm happy to say that I think my current progress will lead to the ability to have a fundamentally happy life through living true to myself. And one day maybe I can share it with a partner that is taking the same journey of self-exploration and growth.

I have missed emptying the thoughts rattling around my head onto a blank screen. And I miss the feedback that my blog received. Most of all I long for the friendships it kindled with people who related to my ramblings. So I'm going to make an honest effort to begin blogging regularly again. I'm not exactly sure of how often or how much but I want to share my journey to the stage and beyond with everyone who encouraged me to take the first steps back in 2014. I wouldn't have made it this far without you all.

Happy Leap Day friends! I'll be back soon!

The Journey

This week has been rough. I'm not complaining though. I expect hard and I want tough. I knew when I registered for Burning River 100 that 'easy' was a thing of the past. Sure I might have easy runs or recovery runs on my schedule but they'll come after hard workouts and more mileage than I have ever consistently run before. I'm going to feel muscles I didn't know I had and I'm going to have to train through illnesses and minor injuries. No more 'playing it safe'.

And, as I thought about this today, I was reminded again how deeply running and life mirror eachother. I started coming down with a cold early this week. By Thursday I felt awful with stuffy head, runny nose, sore throat, headache, body aches and fever. However, I sucked it up and went to work. I felt thankful it was a rest day, sure that I would wake up tomorrow feeling better. But then tomorrow came and I felt WORSE. All through work I wanted nothing more than to curl up in bed. There was no way I could run.

I had a hard workout on the schedule Friday and my long run scheduled for today. I put some effort into figuring out what to do. And I came up with pushing everything back one day. Run my time trial today and my long run Sunday. I'm extremely happy that I woke up feeling better, not 100% but better, today. Because you know what they say about the best laid plans...

As I hit the treadmill (my safety net in case I was still too sick and had to cut it short) for a warm up, 5k time trial, and cool down I thought about how there are no short cuts in life or running. I want a degree so I do the homework and studying sometimes late at night when I should be sleeping. I want to have a meaningful blog so I make time to write about things and leave myself notes with ideas all over. I want to run one hundred miles so I will put in a thousand miles (or more) of training. And that reminded me of my favorite quote and necklace...

 

The front of a necklace is a compass rose and the back says, "The journey begins today." It is a reminder of the quote from Lao-Tzu and I purchased it when I was just beginning to run. I have no idea of the company who made it or anything about it except I have been wearing it for the past four and a half years and it reminds me that I made the first step, the hardest step. Now it's up to me to finish the journey.

On July 28, 2013 when I cross the Burning River finish line I will finally feel that I've completed the journey I set out on in 2008. It doesn't mean my journey will be over, just that it will head in another direction. I can't wait to see what 2013 holds!

Do you have a favorite quote? A favorite piece of jewelry? What inspires you to give it your all every day?